Navigating Holidays with Dementia: Creating New Traditions and Joyful Moments

Holidays are often filled with family traditions, laughter, and celebration. But for families living with dementia, these times can also bring stress, confusion, or sadness. Long gatherings, unfamiliar faces, or even a change in routine may feel overwhelming to your loved one—and to you as a caregiver.

The good news is that with some thoughtful adjustments, holidays can still hold meaning, joy, and connection. By reshaping expectations and creating new traditions, you can make these occasions more comfortable and memorable for everyone.

Simplify Celebrations

Large, noisy gatherings can be disorienting for someone living with dementia. Instead of focusing on what your loved one “used to do,” think about what they can enjoy now. Consider:

• Hosting smaller gatherings with close family or friends
• Keeping visits shorter and less structured
• Choosing quieter spaces within the home for one-on-one moments

By scaling down, you reduce overstimulation while still preserving the spirit of the celebration.

Focus on Familiar Traditions

Familiar sights, sounds, and smells can spark recognition and comfort. Your loved one may not remember everyone’s names, but they may still light up at the sound of a favorite holiday song or the smell of a traditional dish. Play the music they’ve always enjoyed, decorate with familiar items, or cook a family recipe together.

Even if the details fade, the emotions connected to these traditions can remain strong.

Create New, Manageable Traditions

As dementia progresses, old traditions may no longer be realistic. This is an opportunity to create new ones that match your loved one’s abilities and energy level. For example:

• Taking a drive to see holiday lights instead of hosting a large dinner
• Enjoying a small dessert or afternoon tea instead of a full meal
• Sharing a simple activity, like folding napkins, decorating cookies, or arranging flowers

These moments may be smaller, but they can carry just as much meaning.

Plan Around Energy Levels

Many people living with dementia feel more alert earlier in the day and more fatigued or restless in the evening. Plan celebrations for the time of day that works best for your loved one. A morning brunch or midday gathering may be more enjoyable than a late-night event.

Prepare Guests Ahead of Time

Family and friends often want to help but may feel unsure about how to interact. Before they arrive, gently remind them to:

• Speak slowly and clearly
• Use short sentences
• Use name tags
• Approach with kindness and patience
• Avoid correcting or quizzing your loved one’s memory

When visitors understand how to connect, the experience is less stressful for everyone.

Don’t Forget Yourself

Caregivers often put pressure on themselves to make holidays “perfect.” Give yourself permission to let go of expectations and focus on what matters most—connection, presence, and love. If you can, ask someone else to host, bring food, or sit with your loved one so you can have a few moments to yourself.

Holidays with dementia may look different, but they can still be meaningful. By simplifying, adapting traditions, and focusing on the present, you create space for joyful moments. These moments may not look like they did in the past, but they can still nourish your heart and bring comfort to your loved one.

Love, not perfection, is what makes the season meaningful.

If you need dementia caregiver support, please join my dementia support group or schedule your 30-minute consultation.